Wednesday, August 03, 2005

Sequel to Locusts (!) later this year. And more!!

"VAMPIRE BATS (working title) is the story of a former voracious insect specialist [Lucy Lawless], now a college professor in search of a simpler life, who gets caught up in the investigation of a student who is found dead with his body completely depleted of blood. It first appears that he was murdered by another college student, until the professor realizes that the killers are actually vampire bats that have mutated due to a tainted water supply. As the bats become more aggressive, she must find a way to stop them as they threaten the entire college community."

What I find impressive is that CBS is apparently intending to broadcast this around Halloween, meaning that the sequel will be ordered, written, filmed and broadcast six months after the first movie. Roger Corman would be proud.

Damn, I hope Locusts is rebroadcast or put on DVD by then; I don't have my review tape anymore. Also, although in tune character-wise with the end of Locusts, the supplied plot puts Lawless' character into that "My, what a coincidence!" trap. Amazing that she would just happen to be on the scene for another deadly animal infestation.

On the good side...since she and her husband had their kid, they won't spend half the movie whining about their personal strife. Right? Oh, please, tell me they haven't 'separated' in the meantime!

Sadly, there is no word on a follow-up to Spring Break Shark Attack. ("Spring Break Shark Attack II: The Revenge"?).

However, they will be doing yet another disaster mini-series, Catagory 7: End of the World, that is, that's right, a sequel to the earlier Catagory 6: Day of Destruction. You can tell the network honchos demaned a good, highly original script, because the synopsis features a never before-seen sort of character: An evil right-wing evangelist!

"CATEGORY 7: THE END OF THE WORLD (four hours) begins where "Category 6: Day of Destruction" ended -- with the destruction of the city of Chicago by a catastrophic weather system. As the disastrous storm gathers even more strength and begins to ravage the rest of the world, a television evangelist, preying on the fears of a storm battered nation, begins to broadcast alarming warnings of epic biblical plagues. As his predictions begin to come true, the deadly storm continues to wreak havoc culminating over Washington, D.C."

I guess a storm that destroys most of America doesn't provide enough plot fodder, so a human bad guy was necessary. By the way, given the scenario, would an evangelical minister warning of God's Wrath really be so out of bounds? I mean, let's see, in the first movie, Chicago was pretty much wiped out (from what I hear). So a guy broadcasting "alarming warnings" just doesn't seem that...alarming.

On the other hand, you may be saying, "Hey, Ken, at least the Military isn't getting a bum rap!" Well...

"MAYDAY, based on The New York Times bestseller by Nelson DeMille, is a thriller in which chaos and death engulf an airliner traveling from the United States to Tokyo when it is accidentally hit by a U.S. Navy test missile. Because of the sudden change in cabin pressure from a gaping hole in the fuselage, many passengers are lost and a weekend pilot is forced to take control of the plane and try to navigate it to safety."

And hey, time for a remake of Two Minute Warning!:

"TIME BOMB (working title) is a thriller about a threat received by Homeland Security during a big football game, stating that the stadium in Washington, D.C. is rigged to explode during the fourth quarter. Unfolding in real time, the agency joins forces with the FBI, stadium officials and Special Ops to mount a massive reconnaissance operation to break the code and stop the impending disaster that could annihilate 95,000 people."

Ten bucks says this is the work of American neo-Nazis/militia guys/nutty former miltary members. Fifty bucks says it definately won't be the work of Islamic terrorists. (After all, eee-vil Christian evangelicals are one thing...) Any takers?

As noted previously, NBC, meanwhile, will be broadcasting a sequel to their earthquake mini, 10.5, 10.5: Apocalypse:

"In "10.5: Apocalypse," the deadly seismic activities that peaked with a 10.5 earthquake and devastated the west coast in the first miniseries resume to jeopardize North America, causing catastrophic events. In a desperate bid to save lives - and the country - President Hollister (Bridges) calls upon one of the nation's top seismologists, controversial scientist Dr. Samantha Hill (Delaney), to interpret the latest onslaught of quakes. Hill has a new theory based on her father's (Langella) much-discredited hypothesis from years past that if correct, predicts even greater ruin."

Wow, the plot includes Sam's dad. Like I noted often in my review of the original mini, "EVERYONE IS CONNECTED."

Thanks for making my gig such an easy one, folks.


At 10:17 AM, Anonymous Tork_110 said...

What football stadium in Washington D.C.? The Redskins moved to Maryland in 1997. RFK Stadium is used for baseball and soccer games now.

Don't get me wrong. I've heard nothing but bad things about FedEx Field.

And maybe the terrorist attack will be done by Native Americans who want a name change!

At 10:30 AM, Blogger Ken Begg said...

They probably picked Washington partly *because* the stadium would be fictitious.

At 10:43 AM, Anonymous twitterpate said...

Apparently, if a televangelist gives "alarming warnings" after the destruction of Chicago, and storms "ravaging the rest of the world", it's a *BAD* thing. Because, you know, he probably wants people to quit sleeping around and stuff, and that's just wrong.

If an eco-researcher gives "alarming warnings" in the same situation, it's a *GOOD* thing. Because, they'll just want the basis of the economy of the Western world dismantled, which'll be MUCH less trouble.

At 10:54 AM, Blogger Ken Begg said...

Yeah, isn't it weird that nobody appears to have optioned mega-author Michael Crichton's latest novel, State of Fear, which is centers on evil environmentalist terrorists and which Crichton uses as a platform to debunk the 'science' behind global warming theories?

Just a coincidence, I'm sure.

At 4:04 PM, Anonymous thepantedpuffin said...

Maybe Samantha's dad's much-discredited hypothesis from years past will still NOT prove true... If that's the case, I here and now pledge to eat not only my hat, but my entire wardrobe.

At 6:07 PM, Anonymous John Bohlke said...

Maybe Samantha's dad's theory is that Samantha's ego is so gigantic that it actually has a gravity field therefore causing all the earthquakes. Then the rest of the mini-series can be a fugitive rip-off, but with earthquakes.

At 8:01 PM, Blogger Ken Begg said...

John --

So you're saying it's her 'fault'?


At 3:25 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

"A former voracious insect specialist"?

So she got something to eat, and is now a sated insect spcialist?

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